Marks

So, last night I spent a wonderful evening with B.  Every now and again he has to spend the night in Huntsville for work, so I have been trying to coordinate meeting up with him there.  It's only about an hour and a half drive, so it's not inconvenient.  Besides, his time is limited and, of course, I want to spend as much time with him as possible.

We hotel hopped - and it was totally sweet.  The first hotel he booked he didn't like (but told me had I not been with him he would have stayed).  The second hotel was sold out, yet he could book a room online?  Third time was a winner.  We checked in and on our way to the room we passed by a sports bar and I eyed a pool table.  We had a few drinks, shot some pool, retired to our room and had a blast.  The last thing I remember is being cuddled up together.

I woke up around 1:45 with a slight headache and that familiar feel of dehydration.  I downed some water and a handful of crackers and roused B to see if he wanted anything.  We snuggled up again and I couldn't help but planting kisses on his neck and he essentially said something along the lines of "no marks."

Now, I like to leave my mark and wear my lover's mark(s).  I have always been that way.  It's not any place in particular, just something to remind me (and hopefully them) of time spent together.

A couple weeks ago we went away for the weekend and both got a little carried away.  I sent him home with a mark on each side of his neck and it went over like a lead zeppelin.  I felt bad because it seemed to get him in trouble.  I really wasn't surprised when he said no marks.  Of course, I had to stop because I didn't trust myself not to accidentally leave some trace that I had been there and I get that it's not cool.

I just didn't expect to feel a little hesitant at leaving marks elsewhere.  I am having a little anxiety about it because I am afraid I will cross a line inadvertently and it will put him an awkward position again.

Part of me wonders if our relationship will ever be "ok" as far as other people are concerned.  It seems like the only people who are truly ok with it are me, him and WW.  It's not that I need other people to recognize and validate my relationship with him - not at all.  I just hate that it puts him in awkward positions.

Speaking of awkward positions...